I still can't wrap my head around the fact that NCT's Lee Jeno and Na Jaemin are of the same height and build. To me, Jeno is a tall, imposing, muscular youth; and Jaemin is an impish little wood sprite.
Jeno and Jaemin.
Actually Jeno and Jaemin.
Jaemin in particular fascinates me. His fans call him Nana and associate him with pink and ballet shoe emojis. He is wide-mouthed and pink-lipped and his eyes are large and bright. His mien is emphatic but inscrutable, and he insists on bringing a strange chewy sound to every NCT Dream song. His official plushy is this rabbit.
Kkyuping.
The earlier model Jaeminbun is perhaps a more accurate representation of him.
Jaeminbun.
Jaemin and Jeno share the role of Guy Who Raps in NCT Dream - in fact it is often difficult to tell their voices apart. Slowly they will begin to distinguish themselves in a listener's mind once it becomes clear that Jaemin is the one who is always being weird, while Jeno in comparison keeps on the straight and narrow. Here is a famous (infamous?) excerpt of Jaemin's line in NCT U's best song, "Birthday Party".
A favorite tweet of mine.
So Jeno and Jaemin have done a little album together as the unit NCT JNJM. The title track of the mini album is called "Both Sides". I don't have very much to say about it - it is, surprisingly, okay, with an interesting beat and a pretty fun concept: Jeno and Jaemin do not have a "good side" because both sides of their faces are their good sides. Jaemin himself tells us this in the English intro to the song.
Like okay man.
To say that I didn't expect the song to be good is not wholly an insult to Jeno and Jaemin's talents - I just meant that the general shirtlessness and queerbaiting of the teasers made me think there was some overcompensation going on. I guess they were just taking advantage of the marvelous looks of these young men.
Another, longer teaser, with a plot and everything, has Jaemin as a malevolent trickster and Jeno as his Bond-like saboteur. This is, of course, extremely sexually charged. I believe in the wonderful queerbaiting abilities of these two men. They show a lot of promise. I'm not so sure about the acting because I don't speak Korean.
Not a wasteland as in empty. A wasteland as in full of waste. And not waste as in low-effort content. I mean waste as in full of plastic.
I am a slime enthusiast. I'm a big slime enthusiast. I don't play with it often, but I have been watching slime videos for around nine years now, and have grown dependent on these sorts of sensory videos. I know it's shameful. I know it's antithetical to the little rant I'm about to go on about Instagram Crafts and Craft Products. I only say this to introduce how I got onto this side of Instagram.
Crafts and products that have been pissing me off lately:
Makeup products with gimmicky branding
Slime shops (I saw a slime shop video with the caption somewhere along the lines of "I made this, not AI." That's good. But you are also making a living off of something bad for the environment. Kind of sick of seeing this kind of posturing everywhere.)
Taba squishy shops
Ok this is really specific but paint shops that just mix together a random amount of pigment with a random amount of oil/gum arabic to make the Thickest, Grainiest paint ever. And the paint is often in a metallic color, which is fun to LOOK at - but who is actually using THAT much of a metallic color in their paintings?
Resin jewelry shops and the sequins they throw in that goop
Anything involving epoxy - especially those furniture makers who fill in gaps in wood with epoxy
Literally anything with glitter
I know these opinions seem a little extreme. Why can't a gal have some slime? Or some blush? Or some cheap jewelry? But I don't know, I've been feeling a little sensitive about the environment and about capitalism lately. There are just so many bright and gaudy things being pushed at me on Instagram, none of which I actually need. I also hate how these things are marketed, half the time. Besides the low-quality or manipulative strategies used by these videos, I truly believe that just because something is fun to make and to watch being made, doesn't mean it should be made.
Sorry for the long break between posts. Not been feeling my best this week, and my screentime has not helped this slump.
So I'm a manhwa reader, right. When I first started reading manhwa, I sought out good ones. Now I mostly read shitty ones on purpose - formulaic bullshit with brooding male leads and silly plot points and such. It's fun for like five seconds and then the novelty wears off.
Nowadays I read things from scan websites with no comment sections, which is very nice. I like forming my own opinions. Back when I did read comics with comment sections, the peanut gallery below every episode was the bane of my existence. Most comment sections on good manhwa discuss primarily the healthiness of the main relationship, which will fluctuate over the course of the story. Flags abound: "This was such a green flag move from the ML!" or "Uhm, ladies, just so you know, that level of jealousy is a RED FLAG." Naturally as I have uncovered my taste in romance I have grown annoyed by the constant evaluation of the wholesomeness of a fictional relationship. My annoyance is doubled, though, by the fact that webtoon commenters are often both annoying and wrong about what they're reading.
Obviously there is misogyny. There is misogyny toward women who supposedly "get in the way" of the main romance, even if they are not written to be actively malicious or "slutty". "Bitch" is thrown around a lot. Like a lot. I have also seen excess judgement toward female leads who behave outside of the norm - which, like everything I'm about to talk about, is a valid opinion, but many female leads who I have liked for their emotional depth and/or neurodivergence are ripped to shreds in comment sections. These judgements are also often made way too soon, and without context. I get that it's hard to focus on the whole story when reading a serialized comic (which is why I prefer to read manhwa all the way though), but like. It's episode three. You're reading a story which will eventually recontextualize this action or make it seem trivial in the grand scheme of things.
Speaking of that, I also see male leads judged similarly, albeit more rarely. Misunderstandings and other problems caused by natural lack of emotional intelligence as plot devices remain foreign to manhwa readers. I do get it. Sometimes those conflicts are thrown carelessly into a story because the story is stupidly written. But it seems that some readers are turned off by any misunderstanding at all, even if it will soon - again - be recontextualized or given deeper meaning.
We are all bound to use the goomba fallacy at some point.
And this is all ironic because I have read comments on darker comics, ones structured entirely around a male lead's cruelty, which praise said man for his supposed green flags. I would understand it better if people acknowledged the shittiness of the romance they were reading, but they don't. They think the male lead's rough treatment of other women is justified (which is a whole other can of worms) and that consent requested halfway through a sex act is healthy. And it's like, maybe I'm falling victim to the goomba fallacy (see the photo), but where was this grace when a better male lead in a better manhwa made a mistake? Shit, dude, I don't judge you for being here - I'm also at the devil's sacrament! - but at least don't be annoying about the whole thing.
Now I want to talk about the second male lead. Romance aficionados have distinguished a phenomenon called "second male lead syndrome" in which readers of a love story end up rooting for a relationship between the female lead and the romantic rival of the male lead. I got vaxxed against this deadly disease as soon as I opened "True Beauty" in 2020. Fucking hate that webtoon.
Anyway. I have never rooted for a second male lead and a female lead to get together for two reasons.
Most of the time, second male leads in manhwa are either a) actively evil and/or obsessive people, whether that is acknowledged in the story or not; or b) just kind and friendly toward the female lead. Either way I have never seen a second male lead have actual chemistry with a female lead, even if they would be a healthier couple than the female and male lead together. I came here to feel things, and I feel nothing for this man. No matter how handsome he is supposed to be, to me, he is Just Lines.
To put it bluntly, I want to read the love story between the two people on the cover. I want to see the two people whose perspectives are predominantly featured in this comic fall in love. Even if the author subverted expectations in such an ingenious manner as to make the second male lead and female lead both a) have chemistry and b) be "endgame", I'd probably still be a smidge disappointed. I don't wanna go so far as to claim that every character is a "tool" for a story; this isn't a creation myth or a fable. I do think that no matter how much interiority a second male lead has, he will always be in some way a plot device by way of being a second male lead. He is here to cause conflict in the main love story. Sometimes shipping a female lead with a second male lead feels the same to me as shipping her with a set piece, if the manhwa is bad enough.
A male lead will make a mistake in episode two of a manhwa and the comments will be like "I'm already getting second ML syndrome..." GIRL BE PATIENT!! This shit will probably run between 50 and 250 episodes!! Give it some time!! Also, if you don't like this story - read something else!!!
So yeah. I understand that a lot of these commenters are probably children or young adults. Perhaps, though, we should normalize journals. Or telling your grievances to your friends. This is what I do. It's very helpful because people don't have to see your opinion when they're trying to read a goddamn story.
Art Academy: Lessons for Everyone! is an amazing game about being taught to paint by an old man named Vince while his beagle sleeps soundly and guitars sing from your 3DS speakers. This is why everyone with a DS console should hack it. I hacked my New 2DS XL and it was arduous because I am stupid. It was the best decision I have ever made.
The man himself.
My first painting from 2024.
In his lessons, Vince teaches you to sketch and paint in a variety of
different styles. I have not made it far in the game, so I've mostly
done still life lessons. The canvas and function of the media (paints,
pastels, pencils, etc.) replicates real life relatively accurately -
there's no undo button, for example. Paints streak and mix with one
another if you brush a certain way.
I love Vince dearly. I love his real passion for art. Sometimes I mistrust him - sometimes I try to make my painting look more realistic, more pleasing to my own eye. But his paintings almost always look better than mine in the end. Sometimes in the middle of a lesson he will lecture about color theory or Mexican folk art. When you see him put his glasses on and a "skip" button on the bottom screen, you know he's about to drop some wisdom. He's so fucking cool.
The GOAT.
The music of the game is so unimaginably touching to me. This piece is my absolute favorite:
Fuck. I love classical guitar so much. I could cry to this music. Just listen to this one:(By the way, I am going to bring K-pop into this. The bridge of "ASAP" by STAYC sounds very similar to an "Art Academy" piece:
It sort of has a similar soundfont.)
I probably should have been working today, but instead I was finishing up a painting of avocados.
My Superstar SMTOWN missions have taken me places I wouldn't go with a gun, including to the land of Super Junior. One day it took me to the song "California Love" by Donghae of Super Junior, featuring Jeno of NCT. Now, my bias against Super Junior is based primarily on hearsay, so I cannot authoritatively say they're a bad group, though I know some of them to be evil. I would be more open to them if I actually gave a fuck about any solo song of theirs I've heard.
I'll admit that watching their early performances makes me feel warm and nostalgic inside - especially this performance of "Full of Happiness" originally by H.O.T. Their voices really are lovely, their haircuts and outfits familiar. Then again, I also feel warm watching Seventeen's cover of the same song, so maybe I just like this song.
Well, fuck. Now I'm not mad enough to write about this goddamn song. And fuck Super Junior!!!
He looks so passionate in this music video. And pink.
"California Love" starts with a perfectly nice instrumental - nothing new for SM songs specifically, though. After 700 K-pop solo debuts in this style, it sounds like well-made and atmospheric stock music.
And then Donghae comes in and oh my God it's like. Who made this decision.
I don't think his voice sounds pleasant anyway - he's not a very musical performer, because I'm definitely not feeling that California Love right now. That is a statement many people might disagree with, having heard more of his work. I think most of us can agree, though, that the autotune is laughable.
And it does not cease, but remains constant throughout a droning rap. (Said rap only pauses after the words "California bit!" which is something so small but so fucking stupid and sudden it makes me want to laugh.) Donghae is not yet 40, and yet he manages to sound like an old man doing a cha-cha.
"Your pretty face is so small Your cotton candy-like tone excites me Your sexy tanned skin is Gree Gree I think we look good together Your body is like the California sunshine Like debt that follows reckless betting, I’ll bet my everything on you I picture you in my mind again today I’m imagining a song with you."
Whatever the fuck any of this means. This feels like misogyny 2010s-style, like a J.Y. Park song.
[UPDATE: I've looked up "gree gree" to see what it meant - and all I can find for a definition is "an African talisman or amulet". Is this racist? I hope it's like, a Korean expression or something, because that may be egregiously anti-Black. Holy shit.]
Even more old-mannish, though, is the prechorus:
Am I being pranked?
Anyway now we have to talk about Jeno. My opinions on his verse will perhaps be a little more contentious. I don't think Jeno can rap. Rather, Jeno's rapping style suits a particular style of song that I have not heard yet. And after Donghae's aggressive and grating vocals, I am not eager to hear Jeno yell at me.
This is ridiculous. If there is a purpose to this - to introduce such harshness into a song about, presumably, fucking on a beach - if there is a hidden motive, a hidden irony, a hidden place I am meant to discover in this song, I don't want to hear it, anyway. Is it narrow-minded to say this is poorly made? Am I missing something? Is this a hyperpop masterpiece?
Later on, the bridge toys with me, plays with my urge to be fair. There's no Jeno and not as much autotune. The instrumental seems to be building to something. And then the chorus starts again, business as usual.
So, like, whatever. Why was this song made? Was anyone under the impression this would be a hit? Did anyone working on this song have any romance or desire in their heart they just needed to express? (Donghae, at least, sounds into it. He is credited as a lyricist and composer, so we know his heart was in the project.)
Yeah, I'm mad again. And fuck Super Junior - fuck nostalgia - fuck SM Entertainment - fuck the whole state of California - fuck the concept of romantic love. None of it holds anything for me anymore.
Starting out withRed Velvet's official debut - that is, their debut with 5th member Yeri. This is a crazy fucking song about dessert. A bad dessert, too. I feel like ice cream is not meant to be enjoyed in the shape of a cake.
With the chromatic, music-box melody that opens it and the cheerleading chant that closes it, I feel one would easily expect this to be an ironic grown-up play on a nursery rhyme - a very "Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Bitch" kind of thing. Weirdly, though, it kind of isn't - rather, it doesn't rely on that irony, instead choosing to weave it into a song that is, above all, hard-hitting.
The hi-hats scream at you. The key shifts suddenly into a major chorus melody that feels minor. Wendy's "Oh, vanilla chocolate honey with a cherry on top" glitches and disintegrates into Joy's gleeful, rapid rap on a flat 7. In lieu of a bridge we have probably my favorite Red Velvet rap of all time in which Irene, whose elegant appearance suits her name, hops on the beat so forcefully that it makes you think she's mad at you, and Joy follows her with as serious a proclamation of "I have no gwanshim in that bag" as her bright tone can offer.I swear to God the world stops turning every time I hear it.
So we have a "Switch" problem on our hands. How are we meant to interpret "Ice Cream Cake", which is constantly glitching, counting down to little 8-bit explosions, and melting away into a new things, in relation to its childlike "la la las"? Perhaps I'm simply avoiding the possibility of sexual irony, given that Yeri was sixteen in 2015. I do genuinely feel, though, that this song has too much substance to be a simple wink-wink-nudge-nudge.
Don't U Wait No More
This was the first K-pop song producer Dem Jointz ever worked on, you can kind of tell it's his - it's somehow both stripped-down and busy as some of his songs tend to be. When I first listened to this song after hearing a little clip of it that intrigued me, I was really not expecting it to sound the way it did. To someone who can't understand Korean, the frequent overlap of voices and constant repetition make no sense. Having read the lyrics, though, one can understand how that overlap represents two different trains of thought -
"Wanna come closer? Tell me everything
(I keep looking at the shape of your mouth)
You come but then you stop and make a circle with your arms
(Your shoulders are stretching)"
The silly bouncing synth in the background makes the whole thing sound a little off-kilter, but RV's signature harmonies, even if they get a little dissonant at points in the chorus, ground it a little. Even so, the weirdness of the whole is emphasized by their simplicity at times, moving in thirds and sticking mostly to the tonic outside of the chorus. The song ends, suddenly as it begins, with a little cymbal crescendo that cuts off.
I fuck with this. This is quintessential red-concept (as opposed to velvet-concept, the other side of the Red Velvet coin). However, I don't think I would like it nearly as much if it weren't for this cute little performance. Look at Yeri and her silly pigtails!! Look at the hand choreography!! Simply adorable!!!!
Huff n Puff
Shit, if I was a fan of f(x) in 2015, I would be mad as fuck. For context, f(x) is a girl group under SM Entertainment that debuted in 2009. Their final album was released the year The Red, Red Velvet's first album, came out. This song sounds to me like it could have been on one of f(x)'s early-2010s albums, such as Pink Tape - but then, I do need to listen to more f(x). All I know is apparently their fans resented Red Velvet when they first debuted. I imagine this song pissed them off.
"On a sunny afternoon,
I was lazily flipping through a book
My hand stopped
On a pretty and strange picture
It softly beckoned to me to follow it,
So, without knowing,
I fell into it more and more"
Like other songs on The Red, including the title track "Dumb Dumb", "Huff n Puff" is toylike and silly, particularly in its prechoruses, which sound like buildups to a boss fight against a giant rocking horse. Even so, I expected the song to be about a love affair falling apart due to one party's frustration and childishness, or something like that. Instead, a quick read of the lyrics reveals that Red Velvet have entered Wonderland and have also been shrunk very small. Hell yeah, brother.
All of the members went crazy on this song, but especially Wendy, whose delivery of the actual phrase "huff 'n' puff" in the chorus stands out the most, and whose ad-libs are wildly impressive.Her high note on Don't make fun of me! is delivered perfectly. Whimsical Red Velvet songs such as these - called red-concept songs as opposed to velvet-concept - have a strength to them that sets them apart from other silly music of the time.
It seems like every girl group music video from the mid- to late-2010s onward has to include one scene of a girl opening a portal to another world. Even Red Velvet do it in their 2017 video for "Rookie". Only Red Velvet, though, and also f(x), can communicate innocence with such umph behind it. I am not sure what it means in the case of "Ice Cream Cake", but listening to "Huff n Puff" I can just see tiny Red Velvet scurrying around like flies, breathless and awestruck.
While Seulgi and Wendy own the song vocally, Joy's voice is just everything to me. You can hear that her rap at the end of the first prechorus about bunnies fighting was delivered with a smile.
Just look at this!!! The members perform this choreography so passionately - and it's gotta be so fun to do, if you have the knees for it.
With the exception of Boys Planet and its ensuing group ZEROBASEONE, K-pop survival shows do not interest me. Likewise I never watched the show Project 7 or cared about the debut of boy group Close Your Eyes (which I will here on out refer to as CYE) before hearing a brief clip of "All My Poetry". In fact, I was a little pessimistic about them. Judging from a clip of the show's last performances, none of them appeared to be able to really sing.
And, look - for a long while I believed that K-pop stans who railed on and on about how idols used to be able to sing were fundamentally misunderstanding the point of music. I still do believe in my heart of hearts that supposed skill should not be valued over actually good music, and that both of those metrics are subjective, anyway. In the 2000s and 2010s a lot of songs were built around vocal agility in a very specific style, and not all of those songs were actually enjoyable; on a similar note, not all technically skillful vocalists are to everyone's taste. I think that 2020s K-pop so far is good and original. If the music is composed well and the vocals are not grating, I have no qualm with a voice that suits the music, even if it is not too traditionally skilled.
I guess part of the problem is that Twitter has made me hateful. Or that music nowadays takes a lot of inspiration from the 2000s and 2010s, and in order for such pastiches to land, you have to have people who can sing them, in my opinion. Or maybe I've just been lying to myself about having nuance all along. Who knows! Either way, I was determined to ignore CYE.
But holy fuck, man, their debut was so beautiful. "All My Poetry" is more than a title track. It's a song! The synths seem to sound with the same eager clarity and unique tone of the vocals, which blend together perfectly. Does any of that make sense? Almost every element comes together to form a dreamy and harmonious whole. Man, if I write it, does it matter? (I actually used to think the line was "If I'm right, it doesn't matter", which made the song seem more settled and calm rather than insecure and questioning.)
The more I listen to this song, the more I adore it. I listened to their whole first EP "ETERNALT", and found myself mostly struck by their song "To the Woods", which is almost as lovely. It even has a little ritard at the end of each jazzy chorus, which you really don't hear often in K-pop. Some parts of the mini album did feel a little old-fashioned (late-2010s), such as the weird muted-trumpet thing at the beginning of "To The Woods". Otherwise it's a good album for studying.
So, like I said, I love "All My Poetry" more and more with each listen - yet the deep chasm that bisects the song grows deeper and darker every time. That chasm is the rap.
I believe truly that, to borrow a phrase, we must shut down all K-pop rap until we figure out what is going on. I love rap as a genre and cannot in good conscience say that K-pop idols should be banned from taking part in it. But composers seem to believe fans are absolutely enamored with K-pop rap - that normal, tax-paying people are listening to a song awaiting with baited breath the moment when some guy interrupts the entire flow of the song to talk at you, not because he is skilled, but because he cannot sing.
Ma Jingxiang is probably a really nice and talented man. He can probably dance and sing really well, given that he placed first on Project 7 - he will need those skills when the revolution comes and I topple the despotic regime of K-pop rappers once and for all. I believe in Ma Jingxiang as much as I believe in the rest of the group. And also his deep-voiced rap after the first chorus very nearly ruined this song.
yeag
I heap the blame primarily on him and not Minwook, whose subsequent rap is also not good, because Jingxiang's part is the most egregious. I curse the people who okayed this. I curse the K-pop industry for enabling this. This is the worst rap I've ever heard. At least when Felix raps in a Stray Kids song he isn't ruining anything special. This song was special!!!!
And yet it remains special nonetheless! I would not argue with anyone who claims this is the best boy group release of 2025, even despite all this.
I want to also take a look at "X", which was not the next title track but the third, because I have heard good things about it from fans. I have to say that this part will not be equal to my review of "All My Poetry" simply because I haven't let "X" marinate, but I will try my best to be objective.
"X" aligns with what is becoming the CYE sound - synths, harmonies, and funky beat. There's even a trumpet in there sometime toward the end! I enjoy it. The first part that really got to me was the little call-and-response between Yeojun (?) and Kenshin, half because of the little halt in the instrumental, which happens again in the chorus. These stops are cute and they help propel the song forward.
I do also like the whispered "X, X, X" inserted in the chorus between fragments of sweet melody. As with "To the Woods", a synth-y post-chorus follows, and I like it a lot, even if "I got me in the mood" is a nonsensical lyric.
I have to say that I am just not as interested in the subject matter of this song as I was in that of "All My Poetry". This is probably because I watched the music video with captions - the aesthetics of said video are cool but not new, and the English translation is very janky. Besides the prechorus, which is in the simple style I detest, this song is quite original.
This transition from youthful concept to "dark" concept between songs is emblematic of the direction the 5th generation of K-pop seems to be going in. In 2023, with the rise of groups like BOYNEXTDOOR and ZEROBASEONE, I expected gentler visuals to be in vogue. Nowadays, though, as always, boy groups are oscillating between the cheesy and the gritty. I feel like darker songs either tend to follow a title-track formula or blatantly rip off hip-hop and R&B songs trending in the West - and although this is not to say brighter songs do not have similar problems, I hear more originality and more fun in them.
I want to see where CYE is going. Frankly, it isn't their musical trademark I want them to keep developing. I won't be interested if every song sounds like "All My Poetry"; I'd much rather them maintain the song's bravery, its commitment to being musical first. I want to hear good things from them, not trendy things or shocking things.
So that is my review. Be sure to send hate mail if you agree.
I believe there are great songs out there with simple lyrics which merit derives from their music or style of delivery - either because the music lends new meaning to otherwise simple messages, or the lyrics serve as unobtrusive vehicles for the music. "Flamingo" by Kero Kero Bonito probably fits into that category. The meaning of the lyrics is very simple, but the unique music gives it a playfulness that, while not suggesting irony, does give a sense of self-awareness. Do you get what I mean? I have only gathered this from other people's opinions about music.
I have heard plenty of love songs that seem to only be about love because they have to. Do I really care about the romance of "Sticker" by NCT 127? I don't know. (Although most of the lyrics don't stick out to me because they're Korean, I certainly don't give a fuck about the English lines either.)
I find it impossible to believe that I am meant only to focus on the fast-paced instrumental of "Lipstick" from NCT 127's 2021 Japanese album "Loveholic", though. It's too lyrically dense for me to ignore what's being said.
In my opinion, "Loveholic" was not NCT's best work. "gimme gimme" is probably my least favorite 127 title track. It has none of the stupid charm of earlier Japanese track "Chain". It feels ridiculous. It feels Stray Kids. On first listen, I was also unimpressed by "Lipstick", about which I had heard some. Now I cannot imagine why I felt that way.
As of writing this, I haven't even read the translation, and yet I am sure this is probably one of the more explicitly sexual of 127's songs. It's not much, but I cannot help even comparing it to Taeyong's masochistic rap in "Baby Don't Like It".
"You are like an actress (woo), you have a shining status (uh-huh) Girl, you dress to impress, I embrace you I wanna get you in bed, ha!"
Like first of all what are we talking about. Second of all I am obsessed with the cheekiness of the lyrics paired with the very serious instrumental. I would expect a song like this to focus primarily on personal luxury, with romance taking the back seat (a la "Bad Alive" by WayV, which only really gets romantic in the bridge). But the Bentley is quickly forgotten here in favor of a woman's luscious lips and makeup skills - so the energetic music no longer represents the luxurious backdrop of a fling but the fling itself. Is it stupid that I find myself moved by such a picture of romance? That I am analyzing the relationship portrayed in a fucking NCT b-side?
I talk about this kind of love song like it's entirely foreign, which is ridiculous. There are a thousand other songs that fit this description, such as Sisqó's "Thong Song", another genuinely beautiful work. I just think these songs ought to be appreciated for the perspective they offer. Get serious about that lipstick, boys.
Highlights:
The prechorus and bridge, which are some of the most static elements of K-pop songs, are sort of snoozefests - but the verses are really fun. I speak of "時には sweetie, 今度は cutie" and "無邪氣に girly, 今夜は sexy!" (the latter of which, contrary to what Genius writes, is definitely said by Yuta, not Haechan). I can't get those parts specifically out of my head.
If the rest of the song is all over the place, then the dance break is a mess. It's almost not sexy anymore. We get it. You really fuck with that lipstick.
Is it possible for a person to feel so strongly for another person? Like in real life? - to find them beautiful for a few months, I mean, before settling again into loneliness and unfulfillment? Is sleeping next to them refreshing? Or does it take away from you like everything else?
Why do people like computer keyboards that sound like shit? Keyboards the ASMR community say sound "creamy" really give me the feeling that I'm vomiting up a Labubu
It is the day after 127 day and I am writing about EXO! Good God!
EXO is relevant to my life right now and I am not sure why. They did have a comeback recently, but it lacked two of their main vocalists for complicated legal reasons and also apparently half of the music video is AI-generated. The goat has been washed, so to speak, for around three years now, I fear.
And yet I find myself thinking about Chanyeol more and more frequently. I don't even fuck with Chanyeol like that. I'm just thinking about him.
Do I think EXO has a superior discography? Certainly superior to most groups'; I do fear they were most active at a time when it was simply unheard of to make good music, resulting in songs like "Ko Ko Bop" and "Love Shot" (please don't kill me). However, the main vocalists of EXO - I refer to Chen, Baekhyun, D.O. (Kyungsoo), and at one point Luhan - possess some of the highest, clearest, handsomest tones I have ever heard. I think people who composed for EXO understood this, generally, so EXO songs are set apart to me by the beauty of their melodies.
Their debut song "MAMA", released in Korean and Chinese, starts with this crazy high note. Here is D.O. singing in the Korean version.
Here is Chen singing in the Chinese version. (You can hear how much sharper Chen's high tone is.)
What interests me most about these kinds of parts is their flashy melody, not just their virtuosity. That climb from a fifth to a major seventh shows up again in "Wolf".
I'm going to assign you the Herculean task of ignoring everything else but the music in this clip, including D.O. sounding like the guy from Fall Out Boy and Kai's flagrant cultural appropriation, both of which are important topics, if the latter more so. The song is also bad. Sorry about that.
The producers have supplemented Chen's shaky high note with a blindingly tight harmony not uncommon in any K-pop song of this time, and certainly not uncommon in EXO's music. Also not surprising is the insanity that is the range of the chorus melody, which was originally a whole step higher (try not to laugh). I find it interesting that the first phrase ends on the third scale degree.
Then, at the end of the second chorus phrase, the high note. When I heard it for the first time I was floored. What a direction to take this song in! I have cut the clip off as abruptly as the high note was cut off in the song, because the producers did have an obligation to remind us that the song is bad, and that any semblance of good music is to be pruned lest it infect the tree.
Finally I will draw attention to the famous bridge of "Tempo", released in 2018.
The "I can't believe" part is more significant considering it's a callback to the intro of the song.
The first real chill-inducing moment is the relaxation into the sweet "Nareul gamssa aneun yuilhan namanui savior" after that jazzy first motive. The second is the gentle little "Modu geureon neol baraboge dwae" before Baekhyun comes in swinging and Suho echoes him. Contradictory to EXO's wishes as expressed in the chorus (do not mess up their tempo), the tempo of this song is both held (in a literal sense) and disrupted (in a metaphorical sense) throughout. While underneath the acapella harmonies do not change tonally, Suho's gentle inquiries that begin the bridge contrast with Baekhyun's aggression nicely.
Anyway, here was me getting pretentious about EXO. Here before Baekhyun goes to jail for tax evasion. (For legal reasons that is a joke.)
In my introductory blog post, I mentioned that gameplay involves a lot of leveling up cards, like in Project Sekai - and now that I have verified the definition of "gacha game" it is occurring to me that this blog may become a log of my gambling addiction. Fuck.
So be it.
Anyway, my main card-upgrading strategy is to sacrifice every card I receive of a member of Super Junior. I have no Super Junior cards; I sacrifice them all when there is an occasion to level up another card. Collecting SuJu cards is my very last priority.
Joy's gaping maw receives the sacrifices of Kyuhyun and Zhoumi. (Neither card succeeded.)
My secondary strategy is to sacrifice a) duplicate cards in lower grades (why have a C-tier "Obsession" themed Sehun card if I already have a B-tier one?) or b) duplicate cards in the same grade that I don't feel like using to make cards go up a grade (for example, if I max out two C-tier identical "Married to the Music" themed Minho cards, I can combine them into one B-tier card).
I could've combined these two Kais, but IDRGAF, so I sacrificed one to the other.
Click to see my cool cards.
This week, "Something's in the Water" by RIIZE became playable on Superstar SM. During events like these, there will usually be special "event" cards listed as separate from the regular group cards, and with fancy borders and shit. There are also missions attached to it - missions involving collecting a certain amount of event cards and getting a specific score on the song. I have five out of six cards in various grades, but only some are rewards for doing the missions: after a while they just expect you to buy the rest using diamonds, a currency notoriously difficult to attain.
Phase one of the missions. How am I to survive in these conditions?
You can see where they stopped giving me cards.
The higher your card grade and star-level on a card, the more points you gain by hitting notes while that card is on the screen. Therefore, if I don't have high enough grade cards, I will never get 2,000,000 points - and the challenge ends tomorrow!!!
Fuck, this is embarrassing. If I complete all three phases, all I'll get is a wallpaper. But I also want to win! I want to get it all done!!
Superstar SMTOWN really is an ingenious game model. There are so many groups under SM, and many of them are still releasing music, giving it a large and ever-expanding music library and therefore an ever-expanding library of cards. I guess that's the premise of every rhythm game, though.
I have always envied people who can crochet, but never felt I had the energy or drive to pick up a new hobby. Turns out I do! Today was day three of crocheting and I have already made some good practice pieces.
My first complete practice "project" thing.
It's nice and useful - it keeps me off my phone, and I do need to be doing something with my hands in order to focus.
More aimless stitching.
So-called "granny squares" were harder to make. The cool thing about crocheting, though, is that you can just start over at any time. I started over a few times with my first granny squares. It felt good even to fail - it just meant I had more things to do with my hands! I'm sure I will be more perfectionist with my first big projects.
My first granny squares.
Unfortunately, I hate the texture of thickly knit and crocheted clothing, so I'll just be making a bunch of excess for a while. I think crocheting is one of those things that's not so useful now that we have mass-produced fabric, which is awful because it's so fucking addictive.
The story of Cephalus and Procris serves to remind us all that people didn't tell stories quite the same as they do now, because things just kind of happen. So Procris is of the house of Athens, the niece of Procne, who became the first nightingale, and Cephalus is a descendant of the King of the Winds and a hunter. The goddess Aurora falls in love with Cephalus and kidnaps him. He begs to be let go so he can be with his wife. Aurora assents but suggests Procris could have cheated on him. Cephalus goes back in disguise to test Procris's loyalty.
Zoom in on Cephalus' face. He does NOT fuck with Aurora!!!!
"He made passionate love to her, always reminding her, too, that her husband had forsaken her. Nevertheless for a long time he could not move her. To all his pleas she made the same answer, “I belong to him. Wherever he is I keep my love for him.”
But one day when he was pouring out petitions, persuasions, promises, she hesitated. She did not give in; she only did not firmly oppose him, but that was enough for Cephalus." (272)
Not sure what Procris looks so happy about here.
He yells at her because he's a bitch. And she leaves and forsakes the company of men. Which was the right thing to do. Unfortunately she eventually forgives him, and many years later he accidentally kills her while they're hunting.
So much happening there. So much to play with: Cephalus being flighty because he's a descendant of the winds - Aurora being so central to the plot and yet somehow not - Procris dying at the hands of her husband because men aren't shit - etc.
Élisabeth Jacquet de La Guerre's opera Céphale et Procris, with a libretto by Joseph-François Duché de Vancy, is a little different. This version makes its moral slightly more obvious. Céphale and Procris are not married, but Aurora still wants to fuck the former, and tells Minerva to tell her priestess that Procris should marry some guy named Borée. Then she kidnaps Céphale. When she eventually lets him go, she sends a fury of jealousy upon Procris, who runs away and agrees to marry Borée. Then Céphale goes to fight Borée and kills Procris in the process.
The beginning of the death scene of Céphale et Procris. Beautiful stuff...
I suppose I'm not feeling the blog feeling today. I hope this doesn't indicate a permanent burnout - I simply can't let another hobby die out - something has to stick. Something has to stick!
When I was little, my main source of Greek mythology was Edith Hamilton's Mythology, which contained Greek, Roman, and Norse tales. The book is mostly comprised of retellings of Greco-Roman myths, with a hilariously small section for Norse myths at the back. I read it cover to cover when I was little. I especially loved the little love stories, such as that of Cupid and Psyche and of Pomona and Vertumnus.
The book is on archive.org now, thankfully, allowing me to relive my long, long mythology phase.
"Greek mythology is largely made up of stories about gods and goddesses, but it must not be read as a kind of Greek Bible, an account of the Greek religion. According to the most modern idea, a real myth has nothing to do with religion. It is an explanation of something in nature; how, for instance, any and everything in the universe came into existence: men, animals, this or that tree or flower, the sun, the moon, the stars, storms, eruptions, earthquakes, all that is and all that happens... Myths are early science, the result of men's first trying to explain what they saw around them. But there are many so-called myths which explain nothing at all... This fact is now generally accepted; and we do not have to try to find in every mythological heroine the moon or the dawn and in every hero's life a sun myth. The stories are early literature as well as early science." (19)
Hamilton makes a lot of claims in this introduction. Her rather xenophobic assertion that the Greeks were basically the first rational beings on the planet sets the tone for the time period. And although indeed one probably should not compare a compilation of miscellaneous stories to the Bible, which was claimed by scholars of the religion to be entirely true despite its contradictions, this paragraph kind of downplays that yeah, what we think of as Greek mythology was in no little part Greek religion. I'm no scholar, but I can probably tell you that the story of the founding of Athens was, at least officially, thought to be reality. Was everyone taking the story of Acis and Galatea to be fact? I don't know. But the gods were indeed worshiped!
Who knows. Again, I'm not a scholar. Hamilton does go on to address the evolution of Zeus as a worshiped god, and how his characterization evolved over time.
Looking again at the introduction, I'm remembering what Hamilton taught me about the Greek versus the Roman writers.
"Most of the books about the stories of classical mythology depend chiefly upon the Latin poet Ovid, who wrote during the reign of Augustus. Ovid is a compendium of mythology. No ancient writer can compare with him in this respect. He told almost all the stories and he told them at great length. Occasionally stories familiar to us through literature and art have come down to us only in his pages. In this book I have avoided using him as far as possible. Undoubtedly he was a good poet and a good storyteller and able to appreciate the myths enough to realize what excellent material they offered him; but he was really farther away from them in his point of view than we are today. They were sheer nonsense to him...
He says in effect to his reader, “Never mind how silly they are. I will dress them up so prettily for you that you will like them." And he does, often very prettily indeed, but in his hands the stories which were factual truth and solemn truth to the early Greek poets Hesiod and Pindar, and vehicles of deep religious truth to the Greek tragedians, become idle tales, sometimes witty and diverting, often sentimental and distressingly rhetorical. The Greek mythologists are not rhetoricians and are notably free from sentimentality." (21)
What an approach! Being born the same year as the death of Thomas Bulfinch, who retold even Greek myths with Latin names for the gods! Writing after all the operas and plays based on stories from Ovid!
And it seriously biased me against the Romans. The Greek mythological revival of the 2010s did seem to ignore Rome as well, although I will always hold that my favorite love story of Cupid and Psyche is in fact originally Roman. (I did hear once it was based on an old Greek story, but I am not sure.)
"It was a simple matter to adopt the Greek gods because the Romans did not have definitely personified gods of their own. They were a people of deep religious feeling, but they had little imagination, They could never have created the Olympians, each a distinct, vivid personality. Their gods, before they took over from the Greeks, were vague, hardly more than a 'those that are above.'" (44)
Like hello? The shade?
Anyway, stay tuned for my opinion on some fucked-up myths, including Cephalus and Procris, subjects of the Élisabeth Jacquet de la Guerre opera "Cephale et Procris".
Spent all last night trying to get audio clips to work. Really hope it works tonight...
There is a part of "Dallas Love Field" by Kim Doyoung that sounds very baroque to me. For a while I thought I was a little insane because I could not find an example of this particular progression. But I have found something vaguely resembling it, and so now I will share my pattern recognition with the world.
Doesn't the "dallilsurok sumchalsurok" part sound a little classical? Doesn't it have a little bit of that 17th century flair? Here is a clip from "Je suis aymé de celle que j'adore", an air by Michel Lambert. A bit of a resemblence, right?
The successive leaps up of a fourth and down of a third on "Nos plaisirs sont d'autant" resemble the artistry of NCT's eldest rabbit.
I have hastily transcribed the Doyoung splice.
"Dallas Love Field" takes a rather strange route with a modulation into B major. If we followed the pattern to the end it might look something like this.
Didn't really know how to finish this.
Literally all I had to say today. Hope everyone's doing well.
I am sick of it. Oh my god. Either you can't play the audio, or you CAN play the audio but the text fucking disappears. How do I do this. I was so excited about my post today and now I can't post it!!
I have expressed this online before, but I think people who shit on Tumblr or BlueSky while having Twitter accounts are absurd. You have a Twitter account. You have no excuse to have a Twitter account.
That being said, I joined Twitter with a private account in March of last year and am still on there.
I cannot wean myself from it. I don't have the app - I use Firefox on my phone to access it - so there's no way to delete it in order to make it less accessible. I thought Blogger and Tumblr would make for good alternatives, but I don't have Blogger on my phone, and frankly, not much goes on on Tumblr. (I know for a fact it is not dead, though. Please get on Tumblr.)
My impulse to be on Twitter is the same as my impulse to be on Spotify, which I only got so I could track my listening stats with last.fm. I want to be in the know. I want to be able to interact with my friends, and - well - I want attention. I am no less performative than anyone else. I got an Instagram recently and am trying to balance sharing K-pop songs with Baroque arias so people know I'm multifaceted like that.
I should be smarter than all this. Anyone else feel like they should be smarter than this? Aren't we supposed to be better than those people who must constantly announce themselves by being funny, or witty, or morally superior? Shouldn't we be able to strong-arm ourselves into keeping from getting on our phones when we are uncomfortable in real life?
I do feel at times when I'm at an oppressively uncomfortable social gathering or event that the world must shrink down to just me and Twitter. These are times when I think I'm allowed to cope by watching my favorite K-pop boys dance in vertical concert videos. But, predictably, I remain miserable, hunched over with eyes straining to read.
Whatever. These kinds of posts are why I'm on Blogger and not Substack.
Yes... I skipped a day... I have failed already! I was going to finish this last night, but by then it was 2:30 in the morning, since I had spent so much time watching my first three episodes of House M.D. with my sister. I hated it. I hate that mean-spirited, evil show. But that's not the subject of this blog post.
I would say I'm avoiding the subject of House M.D. to preserve my own peace, as I have been prone to anger this week, and it hurts my head. But the subject on which I am about to comment, though not invoking in me the rage that House M.D. did in the midnight hours of the 16th and 17th, is certainly not a cheerful one, and it does not excite my heart so much as leave my head stuffy and aching.
So last night I got this video on my recommended page, which is strange because I don't listen to Enhypen.
I had seen a clip of this song before, used by a girl group stan to disparage the new trend for rage hip-hop in K-pop, attributed to CORTIS with their songs "GO" and "FaSHioN". I have to confess I'm not a fan of CORTIS either, not the least because I don't stream any group under HYBE for their explicit ties to Israel. (This is painful at times because one of my favorite groups, Seventeen, is under HYBE.)
And I do not like the rage hip-hop trend in K-pop - even though I think rage hip-hop is super fucking cool. It's just that the structure of the typical K-pop song, with chorus and verse kept strictly apart, does not seem to suit the dizzying intensity of the genre. One of the reasons "Fame" by RIIZE fell flat on its face was its insistence on also being a pop song, with subdued verses and a typical prechorus build-up. The chorus was passionate enough, if forgettable, but overall the group's talents did not suit the genre at all.
"Knife" is a pretty inoffensive song when you listen to the whole thing. For the first 20 seconds, though, it is laughable. The song begins with a silly little sample of this vine.
Could this sample have been effective in combining a playful tone with something more intense? In another life, maybe. Here it feels like an AI-generated parody of a K-pop song. ChatGPT, generate me an Enhypen song based off of this vine. If this song were entirely AI-generated I would not be surprised.
The verses are... fine. We have the nice little melody fragment that has to be repeated four times across two boys' voices; we have the brief prechorus melody alternated with awkward "nahs" and "mms", and then the goddamn chorus again, and perhaps we should stop trying to redo "FE!N". Let's give up. The average person listens to a song and appreciates it, while the small group of evil, evil people who compose songs to sell to K-pop companies listen to a song and immediately begin to brainstorm ways to make money off of it.
I am not here to discuss the complicated political history of K-pop cultural appropriation, though. I am not nearly informed enough about that, nor can I claim expertise in rage hip-hop - although I listened to a few songs ("Miss the Rage" and "FE!N" included) for this post. I also returned to "Breathe" by boy group xikers.
Guys, I have to be real with you. I hate xikers. They have the Stray Kids problem of being clamorous without any real musical originality, and some of their voices I find straight-up unpleasant to listen to (although that is extremely subjective, and I'm sure they're nice boys). Plus, being from nine months ago, "Breathe" looks like an even more egregious "FE!N" ripoff than "Knife". But it has a little more life, more personality, more youth to it, making Enhypen sound tired and behind the times in comparison. I am even charmed by the tinny "nollan geoya hokshi?" before the chorus. Like, sure. If you're going to do this, at least make it funny.
I do not want to pretend that "Knife" is not somewhat powerful when listened to independently. If toy-like and absurd, the beat does have some kick to it. And mercifully the song ends after two minutes and twenty seconds. However, this song is a trend-killing, tired, limp failure. I know people who compose for Enhypen will never learn their lesson, but I hope groups that cannot afford to release a bad song will.
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